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When ambition results in catastrophic failure


“Heat” is like the Titanic. It’s hyped up, built with infallible material, and it ends up sinking in about the same number of hours as that ill-fated ship.

Robert DeNiro and Al Pacino don’t simply share billing on a poster. In the film they are actually enemies. Robert is a robber, Al is a cop. Cops vs. robbers. Good guys vs. bad guys. It was destined to be iconic, and looking back this is one of the biggest cinematic disasters mankind has ever recorded.

It’s absolutely the result of Michael Mann. A casual viewer can easily pick up on his modus operandi. He likes to shoot cold, heartless stories like it’s some sort of challenge. Heist films are a natural shoe-in for that style, because typically the director is more invested in the heists than the characters. See any David Mamet heist movie to know what I’m talking about.

What you get is an alternative treatment to Ambien for your insomnia. Just put in “Heat” or everything else Michael Mann has ever made, and you will feel your eyelids slowly close. The darkness that awaits you will be more heavenly than any you’ve experienced before.

There is no reason to tip toe around the subject of Michael Mann’s “Heat”. The time for thoughtful discussion is over. We’re not going to talk about what this movie does right, which I can tell you in three words: His gun battles. (damn I guess I just talked about it) You know what, Michael? I get it. I appreciate your meticulous attention to detail. Now go figure out how to tell a story without boring me half to death!


One response to “When ambition results in catastrophic failure

  1. YES YES!! I’m so glad we agree about this. Heat is an awful movie. I couldn’t understand why my friends in highschool praised this unimaginative hunk of shit. How does Michael Mann continue to get work? All he does is made shitty hand cam movies.

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